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Hilariously inept performances

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DB
March 31, 2023, 4:19pm
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Quoted from Dodorondon
Few will remember the home debut of George McLean in the mid 60s. In came a perfect corner at head height and a certain goal. George launched into a bicycle kick and the ball disappeared out the ground. Next a wonderful low ball into the box, perfect for a side foot into the net. George threw himself into a diving header which spun away for a throw in.

Oh how we laughed…… but 92 appearances, 41 goals. Douglas Lamming described this in his who’s who as a ‘fair scoring record’! A much loved and decidedly above average goal scorer.


I remember watching George who was very popular at the time. Before him, though we had Mike Cullen who, gifted at times setting up Ron Rafferty, played some howlers in many games.



You can please some of the forumites some of the time but not all the forumites all of the time
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BrMarin
March 31, 2023, 5:42pm
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Tommy "fourpast" wins for me
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Abdul19
March 31, 2023, 6:30pm

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Quoted from Gainsbro_Mariner


Gotta be in for a shout of one of the most disappointing signings in the clubs history, his spell here killed his career dead.

Came to us after rejecting a new contract at Brentford where had just won their "Player of the Season" award, was only 29 years old and had prior experience at Burnley, Bristol City and Swindon (also winning a POTY award)

Came to us, played regularly up until October, then just a few odd appearances here and there, only made 1 appearance the following year before being released. Ended up at Barrow whilst they were in the NL North and didn't even get on the field. Played 9 times for Buxton the following season in the 8th tier of football and then retired at the age of 31.

No idea what happened to him after retirement.


Became a postman. Insert your own pun!


JESUS AT THE CENTRE
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Maringer
March 31, 2023, 6:32pm
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Heywood had the turning circle of a pocket battleship. He must have been playing alongside some really, really mobile teammates during the season he won a POTY award at Brentford.
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RonMariner
March 31, 2023, 7:44pm

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Kelly away at Cambridge just before Jolley took over. We lost 3-0 and were lucky to get nil.

It was a shocking team performance that I didn't think could get any worse. Then Kelly came on. His first contribution was to inexplicably jump three feet in the air the first time an opponent got within two yards of him. He seemed to treat the ball like an unexploded bomb.

How Jolly kept us up that season I will never know.  
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moosey_club
March 31, 2023, 8:35pm
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Quoted from toontown


My first thought was Tony Caldwell- I remember him coming on for his debut, me and my teenaged mate looking forward to seeing what he could do, his first involvement Is when the ball roles over to him near the touchline. He attempts to control it, the ball rolls under his feet and off the pitch. We just turned, looked at each other and laughed.

Better was to come, about 3 weeks later I return to grimsby having been away for a brief holiday, ask him how that caldwell is getting on - we've sold him already! Must surely be the shortest length of service for a contracted, paid money for town player - lasted 3 weeks I think and was sold for the grand sum of 10k (before bosman so every player was worth something - him very little). Alan Buckley said he was the worst player he'd ever seen, think he had signed him based on the memory of seeing him perform once.


From memory he was a very early Buckley Mk 1 signing..moustacheio'd old striker...think he lasted about 1.5 games worth of minutes over two appearances and then suddenly disappeared as quick as he appeared.



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forza ivano
March 31, 2023, 8:38pm

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Quoted from RonMariner
Kelly away at Cambridge just before Jolley took over. We lost 3-0 and were lucky to get nil.

It was a shocking team performance that I didn't think could get any worse. Then Kelly came on. His first contribution was to inexplicably jump three feet in the air the first time an opponent got within two yards of him. He seemed to treat the ball like an unexploded bomb.

How Jolly kept us up that season I will never know.  


good shout. he looked like he was scared of his own shadow
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Yoda
March 31, 2023, 9:28pm
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Dale Banton takes some beating.
We have signed some dross in the Fenty years.
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Simon
March 31, 2023, 10:30pm
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Quoted from Yoda
Dale Banton takes some beating.
We have signed some dross in the Fenty years.


Cracking perm though



All Town aren't we ..... UTM  
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Davec
March 31, 2023, 10:32pm
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I remember the Lee Ridley performance at York and I actuall I was there and i felt sorry for Lee that day actually, he had a torrid torrid time, before that I didn't think Ridley was all that bad for us, but he never recovered from that York game, sad really.

I also remember the Sam Kelly at Cambridge performance and wow, never seen anything like it, a pathetic excuse of a performance from him.
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