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Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 10:38pm
Ok I told a lie about the huge demand, it was more than huge it was phenominal!

Go on ask me anything, stuff Sara Cox wirh Coxapedia, she know intercourse all about anything......she is a woman ffs  :X

Come on as me a question and i will tell you the answer as I am always right!  8)
Posted by: Wrawby_Mariner, September 29, 2010, 10:51pm; Reply: 1
Ill get the ball rolling on this one


After the crap year I've had is it ok to accept offers of sympathy sex?
Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 10:55pm; Reply: 2
Quoted from Wrawby_Mariner
Ill get the ball rolling on this one


After the crap year I've had is it ok to accept offers of sympathy sex?


This depends  on several factors:

a) Is it female
b) does she have huge gazooners
c) is she dirty as hell and will do things that would bring a tear to Grandad Icey's eye?
d) she she want to get her best female friends involved
e) do you have morals
f) dop you have no shame

Personally nail her hard ;D
Posted by: Kris Mustampa, September 29, 2010, 10:59pm; Reply: 3
Can this crap be moved to the non football board?
Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 11:01pm; Reply: 4
Quoted from Kris Mustampa
Can this crap be moved to the non football board?


No!!!

Ask me some town questions then, simple!  :K)
Posted by: sutton mariner, September 29, 2010, 11:02pm; Reply: 5
Quoted from Kris Mustampa
Can this crap be moved to the non football board?


ermmmm no
Posted by: bawarmy, September 29, 2010, 11:19pm; Reply: 6
Marinerian, is it too late for Kris Mustampa to get a sense of humour or is there still a chance??
Posted by: Les Brechin, September 29, 2010, 11:35pm; Reply: 7
MarinerIan.

Am I clinically insane for watching 5 football matches in 6 days next week?

Tuesday - Chippenham Town v Stourbridge
Wednesday - Swindon Supermarine v Truro City
Thursday - Forest Green v Grimsby Town
Saturday - Walsall v Exeter City
Sunday - Kidderminster Harriers v Grimsby Town
Posted by: Mariner16, September 29, 2010, 11:38pm; Reply: 8
Blakey is it true you were asked to go webcam to a girl called Sara on MSN?  ;)
Posted by: STB, September 29, 2010, 11:42pm; Reply: 9
Where is the love?
Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 11:45pm; Reply: 10
Quoted from bawarmy
Marinerian, is it too late for Kris Mustampa to get a sense of humour or is there still a chance??


He is a lost cause, let him sit by himself chuntering with Dilley Graham in the Mainstand!
Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 11:47pm; Reply: 11
Quoted from STB
Where is the love?


I feel it in my fingers
I feel it in my toes
The love that's all around me
And so the feeling grows
It's written on the wind
It's everywhere I go
So if you really love me
Come on and let it show!
Posted by: marinerian, September 29, 2010, 11:48pm; Reply: 12
Quoted from Mariner16
Blakey is it true you were asked to go webcam to a girl called Sara on MSN?  ;)


I get asked every night by millions of female fans, god I am ace  8)
Posted by: TownLad87, September 30, 2010, 12:24am; Reply: 13
Is it true you have to wear platform shoes just to kiss your missus?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 12:27am; Reply: 14
Quoted from TownLad87
Is it true you have to wear platform shoes just to kiss your missus?


nah 3 yellow pages works best  ;)
Posted by: lukeo, September 30, 2010, 12:59am; Reply: 15
Will i regret giving my ST away to concentrate on playing football myself ?
Posted by: Wrawby_Mariner, September 30, 2010, 1:21am; Reply: 16
Quoted from lukeo
Will i regret giving my ST away to concentrate on playing football myself ?


;D
Posted by: Theimperialcoroner, September 30, 2010, 1:52am; Reply: 17
Quoted from lukeo
Will i regret giving my ST away to concentrate on playing football myself ?


I'll answer that one if I may Ian.......You may not get to every game now, but you will be a bit more excited at the prosepct of turning up when you do go. When you are old and fat and your excrement leg doesn't work properly you can go back to having a season ticket, and when you are like that you'll wish for every moment that you could still play. You can't but you'll always be able to go and watch the Mariners.....

Sorry Ian, struck a chord did that one....
Posted by: Theimperialcoroner, September 30, 2010, 1:53am; Reply: 18
In return I'll ask one though...
Why do people keep responding to that sharp object from down the M180?
Posted by: grimps, September 30, 2010, 6:47am; Reply: 19
when a fly lands on a lightbulb , why dosnt it burn its feet ??
Posted by: Les Brechin, September 30, 2010, 7:23am; Reply: 20
Why haven't you answered my question on the first page of this thread.  ;D
Posted by: dapperz fun pub, September 30, 2010, 7:50am; Reply: 21
its dilly grahams 50th next year should fenty hold a party in mcmenemys in his honour or just dismiss it as hes just another fan?
Posted by: lukeo, September 30, 2010, 8:15am; Reply: 22
Quoted from Theimperialcoroner


I'll answer that one if I may Ian.......You may not get to every game now, but you will be a bit more excited at the prosepct of turning up when you do go. When you are old and fat and your excrement leg doesn't work properly you can go back to having a season ticket, and when you are like that you'll wish for every moment that you could still play. You can't but you'll always be able to go and watch the Mariners.....

Sorry Ian, struck a chord did that one....


As sad as this sounds thanks for that, that has actually 'touched me' if you like  :-/ ;D Made me realise i am doing the right decision.. I am still GTFC through and through and will be there as much as time allows me. See you Thursday night! :D
Posted by: Havelock the Dane, September 30, 2010, 8:24am; Reply: 23
Are you as funny as you think you are?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:39am; Reply: 24
Quoted from Les Brechin
MarinerIan.

Am I clinically insane for watching 5 football matches in 6 days next week?

Tuesday - Chippenham Town v Stourbridge
Wednesday - Swindon Supermarine v Truro City
Thursday - Forest Green v Grimsby Town
Saturday - Walsall v Exeter City
Sunday - Kidderminster Harriers v Grimsby Town


You are bloody nuts and clearly have too much money Les. The money would be much better spent towards The Marinerian In My Pocket Fund. You can pay by Pal pal, cheque or good solid coinage  ;D

To answer your second one, I forgot about the first question hence why I answered it now  ;D
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:40am; Reply: 25
Quoted from Havelock the Dane
Are you as funny as you think you are?


I am much funnier, imagine Lee Eavans on whizz and E's and there you go  :P
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:44am; Reply: 26
Quoted from Theimperialcoroner


I'll answer that one if I may Ian.......You may not get to every game now, but you will be a bit more excited at the prosepct of turning up when you do go. When you are old and fat and your excrement leg doesn't work properly you can go back to having a season ticket, and when you are like that you'll wish for every moment that you could still play. You can't but you'll always be able to go and watch the Mariners.....

Sorry Ian, struck a chord did that one....


A good answer TIC, this should make us appriciate good health and good times, and when times are bad looking to the future wihich with a bit of hope and faith can be very bright!

Best answer award goes to TheImperialCorner  :)
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:48am; Reply: 27
Quoted from Theimperialcoroner
In return I'll ask one though...
Why do people keep responding to that sharp object from down the M180?


I like to humour the simpleton. Him and Denty are clearly bum buddies and go to anti war parades glued to each others loving hippy arses!

The bet way is not to get wound up, remember folks a few years ago those lot were in ore at the way we beat teams like West Ham, drew with Chelsea, beat Liverpool and hammered Wolves, WBA and Birmingham on a regular basis!

Will the finish 10th or above.......my flipping bottom they will  ;D
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:50am; Reply: 28
Quoted from grimps
when a fly lands on a lightbulb , why dosnt it burn its feet ??


because they are bloody hard and not whimps, you must be hard and crazy if you eat excrement all your life!
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 8:52am; Reply: 29
Quoted from dapperz fun pub
its dilly grahams 50th next year should fenty hold a party in mcmenemys in his honour or just dismiss it as hes just another fan?


Lets have a huge party, celebrate his 50th and remember the good times with him, like when he had his  ham salad bowl on Bernards coach and and asked "Mrs Rachel, would you like some of my meat"  ;D

The guy is a legend  :)

Posted by: headingly_mariner, September 30, 2010, 8:54am; Reply: 30
Could you please give  us your personal insight on primordial dwarfism?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 9:13am; Reply: 31
Quoted from headingly_mariner
Could you please give  us your personal insight on primordial dwarfism?


Primordial dwarfism is a rare form of dwarfism that results in a smaller body size in all stages of life beginning from before birth. More specifically, primordial dwarfism is a diagnostic category including specific types of profoundly proportionate dwarfism, in which individuals are extremely small for their age, even as a fetus. Most individuals with primordial dwarfism are not diagnosed until they are about 3 years of age.

I aint a dwarf, I just stopped growing at around 14  :P

Did you ever watch the dwarf olympic games

Also midget Luge in the Winter Olympics too

This is the best by far.....Midget boxing from Thailand:
Oh that made me chuckle  ;D
Posted by: barralad, September 30, 2010, 9:57am; Reply: 32
Anybody who thinks this isn't funny must have had a complete sense of humour shutdown. Primordial Dwarfism?? I believe the current abbreviations are PMSL  ;D ;D ;D
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 12:22pm; Reply: 33
Quoted from barralad
Anybody who thinks this isn't funny must have had a complete sense of humour shutdown. Primordial Dwarfism?? I believe the current abbreviations are PMSL  ;D ;D ;D


It is the people/fans who ask me questions that make Ask Marinerian a flipping awsome read, that and my answers are spot on  8)
Posted by: oldgtfc, September 30, 2010, 12:26pm; Reply: 34
I haven't got anything to do today and I cant be assed to go out.

I fancy an hour or five on Football Manager with the odd male masturbation thrown-in, would that be my best option?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 12:32pm; Reply: 35
Quoted from oldgtfc
I haven't got anything to do today and I cant be assed to go out.

I fancy an hour or five on Football Manager with the odd male masturbation thrown-in, would that be my best option?


I recomend:

First of all start off with a good pulling of the pud, this will start your day off on a good note. Then load up Football manager. Have a break for lunch, well crisps, lemonade, sarnie and busciuts. Go back on Football Manager. STop at 1.40pm and wait for neighbours. Watch that. Then go back on your game till about 4/5pm. It is then time for a half time tugg, load up your fave movies (freesite I am sure are available), you are then ready for your next 5/6 hours of Football Manager  ;D
Posted by: The_Laughing_Mariner, September 30, 2010, 1:43pm; Reply: 36
Nick Colgan    Have i missed something,   What is the latest?    I heard he isnt injured, but not available for selection?????
What is going on please?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 2:12pm; Reply: 37
Nick Colgan    Have i missed something,   What is the latest?    I heard he isnt injured, but not available for selection?????
What is going on please?


He was excrement/still is excrement, no one liked/likes him, I don't want to say to much as I don't want Fumblina to try and sue my big fat bottom  ;D
Posted by: gobby, September 30, 2010, 3:25pm; Reply: 38
Is there a cream out there to save me wet shaving my head (imac type stuff) cos as you know Ian, women just love the baldness ;) 8)
UTMM
Posted by: ginnywings, September 30, 2010, 4:02pm; Reply: 39
Quoted from Theimperialcoroner


I'll answer that one if I may Ian.......You may not get to every game now, but you will be a bit more excited at the prosepct of turning up when you do go. When you are old and fat and your excrement leg doesn't work properly you can go back to having a season ticket, and when you are like that you'll wish for every moment that you could still play. You can't but you'll always be able to go and watch the Mariners.....

Sorry Ian, struck a chord did that one....


100% spot on.

I miss playing more than i miss Town having a good team.
Posted by: Wrawby_Mariner, September 30, 2010, 4:06pm; Reply: 40
Dear Marinerian. . .

Some months ago my mums cat had kittens and we kept one of them.
ue to the fact that only one person in the house wants it. . .ie mum
Should we find an alternate 'home' for it or keep it
Posted by: headingly_mariner, September 30, 2010, 4:11pm; Reply: 41
Quoted from Wrawby_Mariner
Dear Marinerian. . .

Some months ago my mums cat had kittens and we kept one of them.
ue to the fact that only one person in the house wants it. . .ie mum
Should we find an alternate 'home' for it or keep it


  
Posted by: Biccys, September 30, 2010, 4:15pm; Reply: 42
Where's the brick? Besides, a cloth sack is much better. It won't be able to claw it's way out of a cloth sack and follow you home...
Posted by: SuperBobbyC, September 30, 2010, 5:38pm; Reply: 43
When the very first person found you could get milk from a cow's udders, what were they doing in the first place?
Posted by: dapperz fun pub, September 30, 2010, 6:56pm; Reply: 44
Quoted from marinerian


Lets have a huge party, celebrate his 50th and remember the good times with him, like when he had his  ham salad bowl on Bernards coach and and asked "Mrs Rachel, would you like some of my meat"  ;D

The guy is a legend  :)



couldnt agree more(thumbup)
Posted by: dazwev, September 30, 2010, 7:20pm; Reply: 45
Dear Ian,
My Yorkshire terrier is very fond of doing her business
on the kitchen floor, we have tried everything to try and
nip this dirty habit in the bud, sadly our efforts appear to
all be in vain.
Someone recently informed me you are the UK's answer to
Ace Venturer..... Please help.
Many thanks.
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 7:49pm; Reply: 46
Quoted from Wrawby_Mariner
Dear Marinerian. . .

Some months ago my mums cat had kittens and we kept one of them.
ue to the fact that only one person in the house wants it. . .ie mum
Should we find an alternate 'home' for it or keep it


Only you guys in the house hold can decide that, I am sure if you want to put it up for adopttion someone would love a cat :)
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 7:50pm; Reply: 47
Quoted from gobby
Is there a cream out there to save me wet shaving my head (imac type stuff) cos as you know Ian, women just love the baldness ;) 8)
UTMM


Cream is for girls, use a nice bic one blade Razor with cold water and soap  ;D

Honest answer get a good set of clippers, then use a mac three for a smooth feel, women will love it :)
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 7:55pm; Reply: 48
Quoted from SuperBobbyC
When the very first person found you could get milk from a cow's udders, what were they doing in the first place?


It was a young lad called Muhammed from a place called Islamabad back in 199388 BC he got a bit hungry and saw a cow making Muller Lite, so he went over and put his head under it and sucked away at the Udders.

It was warm and trickled down his face, so he went home got a bottle he had saved from Asda and filled it up. He then had a word with 'Aint Milk Brill' geezer and he then went to sell it around the world  8)
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 7:59pm; Reply: 49
Quoted from dazwev
Dear Ian,
My Yorkshire terrier is very fond of doing her business
on the kitchen floor, we have tried everything to try and
nip this dirty habit in the bud, sadly our efforts appear to
all be in vain.
Someone recently informed me you are the UK's answer to
Ace Venturer..... Please help.
Many thanks.


Make it wear a nappy, or as it is about to let one out, put it outside, it will soon get the hang of it.

If that doesn't work sell it on ebay and get a proper mans dog like an Alsation or something lol
Posted by: buckstown, September 30, 2010, 8:32pm; Reply: 50
Marinerian, I'm 57 and going through a serious midlife crisis. Will a sports car make me more attractive to younger women and if so which one? I've got about £108.42 saved up.
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 9:03pm; Reply: 51
Quoted from buckstown
Marinerian, I'm 57 and going through a serious midlife crisis. Will a sports car make me more attractive to younger women and if so which one? I've got about £108.42 saved up.


Mate be different, go for an ex British Army Tank, it will  make you look dead hard and will protect you from the Terrorists that are threatening is!

Another bonus is a copper can't see you making out in it with a hottie of a woman ;-)

Also who is going to try and urine you off when you have a turret you can turn  ;D

Sports cars are so 1980's!
Posted by: ponnyfan, September 30, 2010, 9:13pm; Reply: 52
Dear Marinerian

Do you have any idea when Lewis Gobern's Mrs will strut her horny,sexy body through the Pontoon again on match day  ?
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 9:39pm; Reply: 53
Quoted from ponnyfan
Dear Marinerian

Do you have any idea when Lewis Gobern's Mrs will strut her horny,sexy body through the Pontoon again on match day  ?


With you lot shoutinh "get your mammaries out" every 2 seconds, probally never, rumour is she prefer the Upper Findus  :P
Posted by: ponnyfan, September 30, 2010, 9:50pm; Reply: 54
Quoted from marinerian


With you lot shoutinh "get your mammaries out" every 2 seconds, probally never, rumour is she prefer the Upper Findus  :P
Poor show that
Posted by: dazwev, September 30, 2010, 9:51pm; Reply: 55
Dear Ian,
Which is best to impress the opposite sex:-

A) big hairy gnads
           OR
B) small silky smooth testé
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 10:32pm; Reply: 56
Quoted from dazwev
Dear Ian,
Which is best to impress the opposite sex:-

A) big hairy gnads
           OR
B) small silky smooth testé


most prefer a smooth n silky, means they don't have to get the pubes out from between their teeth! Thoughsome like big gonads that fill up their mouth like a meatball feast  ;D

what would you prefer if you was a woman?
Posted by: Civvy at last, September 30, 2010, 10:37pm; Reply: 57
Quoted from marinerian


most prefer a smooth n silky, means they don't have to get the pubes out from between their teeth! Thoughsome like big gonads that fill up their mouth like a meatball feast  ;D

what would you prefer if you was a woman?


I have nipped on Si's computer while he is on the loo.

Keep it trimmed and we will stay down there a bit longer.

Debs
Posted by: itsnotcoditshaddock, September 30, 2010, 11:12pm; Reply: 58
;D
Posted by: 891 (Guest), September 30, 2010, 11:13pm; Reply: 59
MarinerIan -

My girlfriend has give me a hard choice recently, i need your help !

she told me either take the pictures of naked women of the walls or she will stop me attending GTFC matches what do i do ? :o
Posted by: marinerian, September 30, 2010, 11:40pm; Reply: 60
Quoted from 891
MarinerIan -

My girlfriend has give me a hard choice recently, i need your help !

she told me either take the pictures of naked women of the walls or she will stop me attending GTFC matches what do i do ? :o


Keep the pictures up and it means you can enjoy Town games with no nagging, make it like she is the one being a cow and make her feel guilty  8)

If only all women were like yours  ;D I am  lucky, mine has little intention of going to a game anytime soon  :)
Posted by: mariner91, October 1, 2010, 2:30am; Reply: 61
How soon after getting a phone number do you call or text her?
Posted by: denni266, October 1, 2010, 1:02pm; Reply: 62
Quoted from dapperz fun pub
its dilly grahams 50th next year should fenty hold a party in mcmenemys in his honour or just dismiss it as hes just another fan?


deffinatly a party .. graham is town through and through
Posted by: denni266, October 1, 2010, 1:10pm; Reply: 63
Quoted from headingly_mariner


  


how do you get to thet river/ whats its name  and is there any fish in it , apart from cat fish  ;)
Posted by: Wrawby_Mariner, October 1, 2010, 1:21pm; Reply: 64
Quoted from denni266


how do you get to thet river/ whats its name  and is there any fish in it , apart from cat fish  ;)


Its the Ancholme, and yes there is fish in it
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