Mental Health

Materialism, modern technology, social media do contribute to an increase in non clinical depression, but for me one of the biggest contributors and one quickly overlooked is from modern parenting.
So many child and young adults these days are having counselling for some kind of anxiety or depression, and I think what’s the link?

I have 4 kids 2 adults in their late 20s and I also have 2 children 7 and 9, and I can say for certain there has been a definite change in the way parents behave with their young children these days in only 20 years or so.

We call them helicopter parents just take a look at any local sand pit, paddling pool, or play parks and these parents just will not leave their kids alone. These are the places young children will develop resilience!  they should be learning how to deal with fear, anger, and frustration without adult intervention.

When I was 8 in the early eighties I would be out all day at the weekends with my mates, but this would be classed as way to young by today’s standards, but back then we had gained a kind of independence from our earlier experiences of not being mollycoddled, we could survive a day without mummy, we’d visit nana/grandad without being told, we go scrumping, we’d going swimming/fishing without supervision and I couldn’t even swim (until I was 11) but I had learned how to risk assess.

Quoted from Humbercod

Materialism, modern technology, social media do contribute to an increase in non clinical depression, but for me one of the biggest contributors and one quickly overlooked is from modern parenting.
So many child and young adults these days are having counselling for some kind of anxiety or depression, and I think what’s the link?

I have 4 kids 2 adults in their late 20s and I also have 2 children 7 and 9, and I can say for certain there has been a definite change in the way parents behave with their young children these days in only 20 years or so.

We call them helicopter parents just take a look at any local sand pit, paddling pool, or play parks and these parents just will not leave their kids alone. These are the places young children will develop resilience!  they should be learning how to deal with fear, anger, and frustration without adult intervention.

Fair points. I've heard Carl Froch the boxer say similar. As a youngster his dad and brothers messed about eg playful fighting and so forth and all this as he states helped mould his character for the better. In psychology similar techniques are called roundhouse play and are considered beneficial for children.

What I would add though is love is paramount as well to a kids development. It's why I have huge admiration for the nuns of India who carry on the work of Mother Theresa. They dedicate their lives to looking after the destitute,sick and street children in India who are abandoned.

It's why I can't for the life of me understand how some in this country albeit a small percentage and abroad don't make the effort to look after their children and work and put food on the table . For me children are the greatest gift and to damage them in anyway is sick.

It sounds like you are working on the misconception that these illnesses are a lack of resilience or that somehow toughness is the antithesis of anxiety and depression. It is clearly not as simple as that.

My daughter currently has counselling and she’s a brilliant young person with oodles of kindness, compassion and consideration. I wouldn’t say she isn’t resilient either. She can be a tough cookie if the need arises. I’m extremely proud of her and not just because I’m her Dad.

As I’ve said on numerous occasions I suffer myself and did so incredibly when I was studying a degree but it didn’t stop me achieving a first and I’m not sure I could have done so had I not had perseverance, tenacity or resilience.

I think it’s a dangerous game to be judgemental around this subject area. Especially in a thread that was intended to give people an outlet should they need it.

Quoted from Sandford1981

It sounds like you are working on the misconception that these illnesses are a lack of resilience or that somehow toughness is the antithesis of anxiety and depression. It is clearly not as simple as that.

My daughter currently has counselling and she’s a brilliant young person with oodles of kindness, compassion and consideration. I wouldn’t say she isn’t resilient either. She can be a tough cookie if the need arises. I’m extremely proud of her and not just because I’m her Dad.

As I’ve said on numerous occasions I suffer myself and did so incredibly when I was studying a degree but it didn’t stop me achieving a first and I’m not sure I could have done so had I not had perseverance, tenacity or resilience.

I think it’s a dangerous game to be judgemental around this subject area. Especially in a thread that was intended to give people an outlet should they need it.

I appreciate your input and I know better than most how harsh life can be both from what happened to myself and in my previous job. Having said that I do feel with love and support and effort on oneself most people can work in some capacity.

I've always found it moving when I am in Spain on the Costa Del Sol and you see the migrants especially the Blacks and Morrocons pace up and down the beach all day in sweltering summer heat selling pirate cds and carpets. There is no nanny state to look after them. It's either work or die. This is the case in other countries as well eg children and adults alike in South America scavenging on rubbish tips for things to sell just to make a meagre existence. Harsh world we live in and I have true admiration for people like these who don't give up in the face of unsurmountable difficultys.

Quoted from Rick12

Fair points. I've heard Carl Froch the boxer say similar. As a youngster his dad and brothers messed about eg playful fighting and so forth and all this as he states helped mould his character for the better. In psychology similar techniques are called roundhouse play and are considered beneficial for children.

What I would add though is love is paramount as well to a kids development. It's why I have huge admiration for the nuns of India who carry on the work of Mother Theresa. They dedicate their lives to looking after the destitute,sick and street children in India who are abandoned.

It's why I can't for the life of me understand how some in this country albeit a small percentage and abroad don't make the effort to look after their children and work and put food on the table . For me children are the greatest gift and to damage them in anyway is sick.

Good points Rick we all need love, I tell my youngest 2 everyday that I love them.

Quoted from Humbercod

Good points Rick we all need love, I tell my youngest 2 everyday that I love them.

Good on you. What moved me a lot was watching the Denmark game last Saturday and seeing Christian Eriksen drop down dead and being resuscitated. Alex Scott the BBC sport presenter said exactly what you said after seeing what happened to Eriksen. Rung her mum and told her she loved her. We don't know when will be our last day on earth and everyday should be treasured.

Quoted from Rick12

Good on you. What moved me a lot was watching the Denmark game last Saturday and seeing Christian Eriksen drop down dead and being resuscitated. Alex Scott the BBC sport presenter said exactly what you said after seeing what happened to Eriksen. Rung her mum and told her she loved her. We don't know when will be our last day on earth and everyday should be treasured.

Great discussion with respectful, mature, thoughtful and considered contributions from all. Am I on the wrong site?

Quoted from smokey111

Great discussion with respectful, mature, thoughtful and considered contributions from all. Am I on the wrong site?

It is what it is though Smokey. Sometimes truth is hard to bear. Children die of cancer aged 4 years and younger and have never really had a life only pain and suffering. Life can be so harsh for some. At least these children are suffering no more though. One of my best friends died in agony as well aged only 19 due to natural llness. On the night he died he was having fits and passing out through so much pain and screaming in agony. He refused morphine. It still haunts his mum to this day the way she saw her eldest child die.

Quoted from smokey111

Great discussion with respectful, mature, thoughtful and considered contributions from all. Am I on the wrong site?

Excellent post which gets you a gold star. Once you strip away the ego, verbal diarrhea, front and brashness you find underneath all this there are caring people on this site.  

Quoted from DB

Excellent post which gets you a gold star. Once you strip away the ego, verbal diarrhea, front and brashness you find underneath all this there are caring people on this site.  

Very much so.