Ok, so I'm on a boat trip from Kalkan (Turkey) to Kastellorizo (Greece) 12 of us on board and would you believe it, there's a couple of Scunny fans on here too, a father and son. So, to make this boat trip more pleasurable than it already is for me, and to make it a misery for them please feel free to post some Scunny put downs that I could cheekily drop into a conversation with them, if I get extremely bored! To be fair they're not a bad bunch, so if we go for a scale of 1-10, where 10 is brutal and one is quite friendly I'd be happy with some 9.5s🤣
I know there's some quite witty people here, so give it your best shot.
Hopefully this thread will see us through till tomorrow's match day thread.

Ask them if UTI really does mean urinary tract infection.

Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant just sensible advice.

Quoted from Les Brechin

Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant just sensible advice.

Oi!

Quoted from Les Brechin

Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant just sensible advice.

There’s a very good reason they don’t hold beauty pageants in Scunny any more…

https://web.archive.org/web/20001209215200/http://www.vikingfm.co.uk/honey.htm

If you want we can adopt you for a bit so you can watch some proper football...

Just ask them who they are playing tomorrow
And WHAT LEAGUE IS THAT
UTM

But if they’re both there…. Who’s going to support them tomorrow?

Interesting fact.
Scunthorpe is the only place in the UK where sports direct have a wedding department !!

Some great put downs, guys. Didn't really want them to feel suicidal though ;D

"what times the kick off"..., "well what time can you get here?"  ;)

Ask them why their league season started so early - they played Brigg Town about 3 weeks ago…

Ask them if Boston United play in their league.

Quoted from promotion plaice

Ask them if Boston United play in their league.

I like that!!

They've gone overboard now, couldn't take anymore ;D

Off topic a bit Kalkan is a  lovely place, have you gone to Meis with Osman ?

Quoted from Spidey

They've gone overboard now, couldn't take anymore ;D

You could tell them a Black and White scarf will save them, using a claret and blue they might sink ( further).

Ask them how many pork pies do they need to sell to buy players.

Quoted from gytone

Off topic a bit Kalkan is a  lovely place, have you gone to Meis with Osman ?

Hi mate, yeah gone with Osman booked before we left, he was highly recommended. It was a great trip. Never been to Turkey before, never really fancied it, but wow the people are so friendly and polite, not sure if that's true of all Turkey or just Kalkan. I'll certainly be coming again UTM.

Quoted from DB

You could tell them a Black and White scarf will save them, using a claret and blue they might sink ( further).

Like it!

Quoted from Spidey

Hi mate, yeah gone with Osman booked before we left, he was highly recommended. It was a great trip. Never been to Turkey before, never really fancied it, but wow the people are so friendly and polite, not sure if that's true of all Turkey or just Kalkan. I'll certainly be coming again UTM.

Turks are lovely people, just don't get on the wrong side of them!

being a Town fan just vow undying love of Besiktas and you will have friends for life ;D

Quoted from forza ivano

Turks are lovely people, just don't get on the wrong side of them!

being a Town fan just vow undying love of Besiktas and you will have friends for life ;D

I lived next to the Turkish quarter in Lammasol and they were very friendly and helpful, much more so than the Greek Cypriots.

A mate of mine went to the Scunny ticket office with a couple of twenty pound notes and said ‘Two please’.

The guy behind the counter replied ‘Forwards or defenders?’